I had a relationship with someone that never seemed right. But I couldn’t leave it… even if he ignored me… even if he started taking me for granted…. Even when people started judging me for that love and relationship… even when I started looking at myself differently… counting myself a sinner, a betrayer an unfaith full… Even than my heart never wanted to let him go.
I asked myself again and again… What are you expecting from it? Don’t you know it is blocking your way, it is harmful for your family, dangerous for your mental stability… injurious to your career… it has never given you anything but pain… distress… discomfort and tears… but all my heart ever replied was… I am searching for love … I frowned… It’s not love … it’s just your illusion you moron… and my heart replied… Even than… I don’t want to end this ….
It took me months in fact years to realize that the only thing I was getting out of that relationship was humiliation. Not only from the person I loved, but from the whole world… even my own soul… started screaming at me… I invested my time in that relationship, my money my happiness, my sorrows, my despairs and everything that I had including the peace of my mind still today I am bare handed. I didn’t get a single smile from that man. Still I wanted it to work… I couldn’t get a true word of love from him but still I wrote tons of journals for him and then one day I realized… love is a way overrated emotion.
People ruin their lives, their families, all of their relationships just in the name of love. And by the time they realize it … its already too late.
I used to wonder it for days and days, that who brought us the concept of love? Who was the one sewed a seed of love in us and made us lose everything in the name of love. Were these the movies I watched? Were these the Cinderella kind fairy tales or was it inbuilt in me?
And than one day, before losing everything I realized…
We ponder about moments of love with one particular man, but love can be watering a seed, feeding a cat, smiling at strangers. Love is so broad a term that limiting it towards a single person means actually deceiving yourself. We keep on loving people, giving them what they don’t deserve ignoring the ones who desire our love for all their lives. We do not find peace or serenity our whole life because all we do not understand while loving someone is, Love can never take you for granted, love can never treat you like a shit, love can never humiliate in front of bunch of people.
In fact TRUE LOVE is the one that make you stand tall in front of people. True Love doesn’t want you to leave the whole world while holding its hand. But hold all the hands more strongly and walking with faith is true love. True love is free of possessiveness, petty issues, jealousies or misunderstandings. Love when occur in its true essence make you fly in air without opening your wings, laugh all your happiness with zero insecurities and doubtless of losing it ever. Love – Full fills you. Love – Complete you and your soul.